Why does it go so fast?

I religiously read blogs and follow everyone else’s journey but yet it’s been 2 months since I’ve written anything on my own blog. Shame on me. I guess I’ve taken a break from life if that makes any sense. I haven’t been to a dr or been on meds for a few months. I’ve buried everything deep down inside and didn’t think about it until last week. It was 2:30am and I woke up almost in a panic because the realization hit me that another 3 months have passed  and I’m still not pregnant. From there my mind just spiraled from one thing to another and sleep was no longer a priority, now having a baby was tops on my list again. I’m 2 days away from my next cycle starting and I’ll be calling the clinic to schedule my baseline (fingers crossed there are no cysts) come up with a game plan and hopefully get back on the meds. I read something last week probably from one of the blogs I follow that struck a chord with me…. so much that I wrote it in my notebook, “The days are long but the years are short.” Gosh how true are those words especially when  you’re dealing with infertility. We’ve been struggling for 5 years and my 1st miscarriage is just as fresh in my mind as my 5th one. It’s hard to believe it happened 5 years ago, it still feels like yesterday. The days are long…they’re long when you’re in your 2ww, they’re long when you’re waiting for your cycle to start or long when you have to sit out a month because you have a cyst. Those days drag on for what seems like a lifetime.

I started this blog over a year ago now, a year that has gone so fast and I’m still no further ahead than when I started.


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